So the initial excitement of college getting done and me finally being free is over. Now begins the drivel about 'What next?'. And while I thought I'd be scared of the question, turns out I'm not. I'm quite loving the limited-hour work and having the rest of the day to myself.
While it won't be wrong to say that I've always been a slight loner, I have definitely never ever been more isolated. And guess what, I don't mind at all! All through internship we spoke about how much we'd miss college and each other and how things will suddenly change when there'll be nothing to do! While there are people doing nothing and there are others who've started working full fledged-ly, I think I'm really lucky to have the best of both worlds. I get a lot of practice where I work and it's only 4 hours.
So yeah, what I really want to drone about is how I'm quite loving the being alone thing. There have been so many things I've wanted to do since forever but never had the time! There was so much I wanted to sort out for myself, so much to think, so much to figure out but all that took a backseat. And now I finally have the time.
1. Cook. I LOVE cooking. More like experimenting. I've already tried 3 new recipes in the past month and they weren't too shabby at all! :D I made 'baingan ka bharta' thrice in two weeks and made my sister ate more eggplant than she had in her entire life, so I guess I'm not making that for some time now. :) Then I also made gulabjamuns, which were good too. Mum was sooooper happy. Then the latest was a mushroom dish that was a little spicy but we are Konkanis, nothing is too spicy for us!! :)
2. Learn prayers. I have always wanted to know the 'Hanuman Chalisa' by heart. I've learnt a little bit and I'll probably know the whole thing soon enough. :) Also all the different aartis and bhajans. I feel the power of prayers is underestimated. They have such a capacity to energise and fire up the innate spirituality in a person. Even if you don't know the words or know the words but don't know the meaning, just singing along gives you a high. Although I know some aartis, I want to know so many more.
3. Watch movies. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to watch Salman Khan crap or the likes. I adore old`world cinema. And by old, I don't mean ancient. I mean movies that touch you. That weren't just about making money. So I've seen 'To kill a mockingbird' with Gregory Peck as Atticus Finch ( now that is a hero!), 'The diary of a young girl', the 1959 version with Millie Perkins as Anne Frank, 'Little Women' with Winona Ryder and a few more. I can't watch a lot of movies cuz there's a lot of studying to do but I'm gonna catch up once in a while.
4. Give a shot to cleanliness. I'm a stickler for cleanliness at work but I overcompensate for it at home. My room is THE messiest room in the world ( though I never lose a thing! :/). Whenever anyone in my family can't find anything, the first place to look is my room. In fact every time our 'officials' lose important documents, they should look in my room. If my father is to be believed, they sure have a good chance of finding them there. :)
5. Block negativity. I'm going to intentionally and conciously block out all the negative people and the negativity they bring in my life. There is a lot of positive energy in the world and so many good people but we often get occupied with negativity and trying to figure out a reason for it that we turn our back to the good. Five years back I was sure of myself, of who I am. Through college, I've gone through so many phases of self-doubt, misery, depression etc. Everyone does. So did I. But I'm no longer the person I was. I'm not as strong-headed. I'm surprised by the things I think sometimes or by the way I react to situations. I want to find myself again.I want to find happiness in little things like I did before. I want my peace again.
6. Gratitude. Though I know that I'm more grateful a person than most people I know, I think there is more. Like today when I was walking to the clinic, it was raining hard. If it was last year, I would have cursed the rain, but today I was smiling all the way to the clinic. The beautiful weather, the greenery, my beautiful colony and my good fortune to have been able to be in that moment and be happy. And that made me realize that I'm still the same person somewhere. There are times when I get overwhelmed at how God has been so kind to me as to give me such amazing people in my life, to give me everything I've ever wanted. I've a great life and I wouldn't swap it with anyone for all the wealth in the world. I'm counting my blessings and guess what....they're countless. :)
So these are some of the things. :) There's so much more but it's 1 a.m. and I'm so not a night person. :)
Till next time....